At work, I used to call myself the 'emotional support puppy'.

It was a name I laughingly applied to myself because, no matter where I went or what I did a few simple things were true.

People would come to me for support.
They would tell me the things that they had been scared to tell anyone else.
They would, directly or indirectly, ask for my help to fix their problems.

Pretty brilliant considering I was lawyer, this is exactly what you want, right?

Except, it wasn't just my clients. It was kind of everyone around me.

And the problem was, I had boundaries built of sand.
On the beach.
As the tide was coming in.

See people would feel relieved around me because their burden was lifted, but it wasn't just lifted. It was shifted. On to MY shoulders.

I took responsibility for everyone and everything!

My role wasn't so much emotional support puppy as emotional sponge, soaking up everyone else's stuff and it left me soggy.

(I do love a vivid analogy)

It took me 30 years, complete burnout and a change around in everything I did to realise that the problem was me. Specifically my poor boundaries and need to be liked.

Below is a 5 step process if this weekend, or generally on lockdown life, you're finding yourself a similarly soggy sponge. Click the image to read.

This is an extract from one of the live trainings held last year within The Resilience Academy, my low cost monthly membership to help you manage and prevent burnout, reduce imposter syndrome and stress and fully thrive, at work and at home.

If this has helped you to pause and take a breath this weekend, then check out The Resilience Academy. This month’s theme is Adjustment. Pretty apt, hey?

When you join you'll have access to live weekly trainings, a vault of over 100 hours of past trainings, a monthly bookclub and 2 x 1:1 telephone calls each month, all for less than a daily bottle of Diet Coke.

Click here for more information and to join us: www.searchingforserenity.co.uk/tra-april

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